(5 hours before the Gag Concert shoot)
(Seo Taehun)
Hello, Jaegwan.
Why did you want to see me?
What is it?
It's just break time right now.
Why did you want to see me?
Just have a seat. It's break time.
You guys are really funny with your magic tricks
on Pigeon Magic Troupe.
(Unscripted comedians)
That's when people see comedians...
He doesn't mean any of this.
When it comes to comedians...
I'll start off with something easy.
(Now, the quiz starts!)
You all struggled a lot before
you passed the comedian audition.
- But after the bitter... / - Comes the sweet.
I know! Pleasure follows pain.
Correct! I didn't even finish the question yet!
- Wow! / - Wow!
But your hairstyle says you're the dumbest one.
You look like you would know the least.
What's the name of the dynasty
established by Qin Shi Huang?
The Qin dynasty.
(Correct!)
Then Qin Shi Huang...
The Great Wall of China!
- No, no. / - Let me finish.
Dreaming of eternal life,
he searched for this.
What is the name of this herb?
Herb.
- Herb. / - It's a type of herb.
Dreaming of eternal life.
I used to know this.
Hold on.
Most people respond like this.
"I used to know this."
I know this.
- Raise your hand if you know. / - I know!
Elixir of life!
The elixir plant.
- The elixir plant. / - Yeah, elixir plant.
The elixir plant as an elixir of life.
He looked for that to live forever.
He wanted an elixir of life.
- You're starting to slip. / - No, no.
- You're losing your pace. / - I'm okay yet.
"Eureka!"
What is the name of the guy that said this?
I know.
(Who was it?)
(The answer is Archimedes)
From what I know...
- This person is known for math. / - That's right.
I know! Pythagoras.
I just wanted to mention
a mathematician I know.
Aristotle.
You're just listing all the old scholars you know.
Hold on.
I know. Socrates.
What did Socrates say?
I just said it to be funny.
Who else is there?
Tell me.
Pythagoras and Socrates were mentioned.
(Stop asking, I'm not sure)
He came up with the law of conservation of mass.
Oh! That's right.
He sat in his tub and the water overflowed.
- That's when he shouted, "Eureka!" / - Right!
But I can't remember his name!
(Hahaha)
Since he said Eureka...
Is his name Eureka?
Try to figure it out.
I'm right so far.
He's Greek. He's Greek.
He's from Greece.
How is that important?
He was an explorer.
- He's a mathematician. / - He's a mathematician.
It's 4 syllables.
4 syllables?
4 syllables.
This is the first letter.
It starts with an A.
- Aristotle. / - Aristotle.
No
Aristotle.
I think I know who it is.
His name sounds like Aristotle.
You don't know this?
- Hold on. / - I know!
Augustus?
Not even close!
What was that? Does that person exist?
Archimedes.
- What? / - Archimedes.
Correct!
Impressive.
I always thought I knew a lot of trivia.
But that took too long.
That was really hard.
Kim Dongin's novel, "Spring at Unhyeongung Palace"
is about this person.
Are you insane?
It's about someone.
Are you kidding me?
This should be a big hint.
Who was Gojong's father?
Gojong's father.
(I believe in you guys)
(Blank)
(Thinking)
The last emperor, Gojong.
Don't explain that.
Don't just give me random facts.
Give me the answer.
You'll know right away if I give you a hint.
- Gojong, Sejong? / - This person...
Why would you say Sejong?
I never liked social studies.
He's the one who wouldn't accept foreign culture.
Empress Myeongseong was against him.
- Then, what's his name? / - I can't remember though.
I think I know this one.
How many characters?
3 characters in Korean.
Surname Lee.
- What? / - Isn't it 3 characters?
When we usually refer to this person,
it's 5 characters.
Right, since he has a title.
It's not a title.
Heungseon Daewongun.
Right! You know your trivia.
He knows.
Of course. He's older.
So are you my junior?
- Are you below them too? / - You're next.
You're next.
Back in the day, writers used a brush,
ink, paper and what other item to write with?
Wild grapes.
What?
Wild grapes are a fruit.
Doesn't it go in the ink?
Oh, an ink stone?
Ink stone is correct.
- He said wild grapes. / - Wild grapes.
What do you call these four items combined?
"Four Gentlemen!"
Seongdong!
He's quite the gem.
He's a gem!
- What a gem. / - It's something.
It's something abbreviated. The four items.
Ink, paper, ink stone...
- A brush. / - A brush.
There's something that abbreviates those.
Right.
Writing supplies.
Correct!
Writing supplies is the answer?
Writing supplies.
That's what they called them back then?
Office supplies.
(Hahaha)
Here's a hint.
Four Treasures of the Study.
Oh, he's right.
- Correct. / - He's right.
Here's an easy one.
- An easy one. / - An easy one.
It's an idiom that means to reap what you sow.
Get what you deserve.
- Pardon? / - To get what you deserve.
That's close.
But what I want is...
It's not, "To get what you deserve?"
It starts with a W.
W?
Make it double... That's not right.
Did you watch a lot of "Pokemon?"
Make it double.
"Pokemon!"
That was like Team Rocket.
- You go from zero points to negative 1. / - I know!
What goes around, comes around.
Correct!
That's what I said.
Seongdong!
Okay, okay.
He makes a face whenever he gets one wrong.
What do you call it when you go to the king,
kneel on a straw mat and ask him to punish you?
You see it a lot in historical dramas.
They kneel wearing white clothes.
1, 2, 3.
Seunghyeon doesn't know.
He doesn't know.
Guys with hairstyles like that don't know.
1, 2, 3.
A confession.
His reaction was even funnier!
"Oh!"
"Oh! That sounds right!"
Tell us the answer.
Kneeling to await punishment.
Oh!
I've heard that term before.
This is the world's oldest written law.
It has the clause, "An eye for an eye,
a tooth for a tooth."
It's a famous law.
Right.
Code of Hammurabi.
Correct.
He got it right again.
What's the name of the king that
wrote the Code of Hammurabi?
I've never heard of this before.
What's the name of the king that wrote the code?
I don't know.
It's Hammurabi.
I was worried he would have to ask me.
I was like, "Who wrote that code?"
So funny.
Who did the best today?
1, 2, 3.
Jaegwan is the king of trivia!
(Everyone voted for Jaegwan)
(Bongsunga School)
Hello!
I'm the teacher of Bongsunga School, Kim Daehui.
Who wants to talk first today?
Put your hands up in the air!
DJ Mix time!
Hello, teacher.
I mix everything. I'm DJ Mix Sejin.
Alright, Mix Sejin.
- Teacher, KBS is public TV. / - Right.
They showed Sao-York on a travel show.
What? Sao-York?
I mixed Sao Paulo with New York.
You startled me.
Sao-York was pretty amazing.
Teacher, there's so much I want to eat.
I want sweet and sour chicken,
pork hocks...
- And marinated crabs. / - Alright.
I mixed those three foods I'm craving!
DJ Mix, drop the beat!
Sweet and sour chicken, pork hocks,
marinated crabs...
Marinated crabs, sweet and sour chicken,
pork hocks!
Mari-sweet-hocks!
Want some?
Mari-sweet-hocks!
Everyone!
Mari-sweet-hocks!
I could use a drink, teacher.
Alright.
- I'm going to a cart bar. / - Really?
As a bar snack, I want whelk,
stew...
- And webfoot octopus. / - Yeah?
I mixed those three foods I'm craving!
DJ Mix, drop the beat!
Webfoot octopus, stew, whelk...
Webfoot octopus, stew, whelk!
Web-stew-whelk!
After one drink, web-stew-whelk!
Everyone!
Web-stew-whelk!
This has been DJ Mix Sejin!
Alright, good job, Mix Sejin.
Who wants to talk next?
Where are these brats?
What the...
I knew it!
- You were all here! / - The dean of students.
This one dyed his hair!
This one's outfit is inappropriate!
There are all sorts of weirdos in this class!
Dean, why are you here?
Hello.
I punish all the bad students.
I'm Wang Tiger the teacher.
Hey! Take your textbooks out.
Textbooks?
Mr. Kim.
You need to take their textbooks away.
Why their textbooks?
There are all sorts of idiots
that carry around textbooks.
Idiots with too much time on their hand
and make their math book say "Peeing."
Circus clowns that don't use their pen to study...
And use it to spin their textbook instead!
Idiots that use their textbook as a pillow...
And drool all over it like this.
Idiots that are like Hydra!
And you thought he was studying hard
but he actually drew a flip book.
Weirdos like that!
And childish idiots
that write their name on their book like this
but also write "genius" on their book!
Nobody does that.
He did.
You're so childish!
Take it easy on the students.
How about joining me at the bathhouse after class?
- The bathhouse? / - Yes.
There are too many weirdos at the bathhouse!
What's wrong with the bathhouse?
There are all sorts of idiots at the bathhouse!
When your friend is washing his hair...
There's always one that keeps going...
What's going on? What is this?
Immature idiots that pull this shampoo prank.
Disgusting idiots that pee in the shower
so that everyone can see!
Idiots that don't take a bath
and instead they...
- There's always one. / - Practice golf in the nude!
The guy that's done with the sauna
but when someone else comes in...
He doesn't want to lose.
This idiot ends up passing out.
The guys that scrub themselves and go...
♪ Dead skin, dead skin, dead skin ♪
Human erasers with a bunch of dead skin!
Nobody does that.
I do.
- ♪ Dead skin, dead skin ♪ / - Oh, stop it.
It's time for me to go now.
- Alright. / - Later!
Good job, dean.
Thank you!
Next is CD!
♪ Please just... Even though ♪
♪ The moment I... ♪
♪ I'll give... Everything ♪
It's fine.
Alright.
I'm going to fill-in for G-Dragon's absence.
I'm C-Dragon or CD.
How are you going to fill-in for G-Dragon?
I'm going camping today.
I'll totally have swag when camping.
What will you do when you go camping?
First, I'll eat since I'm hungry.
Wrap this swag beef in some swag lettuce
and eat it in one swag bite!
And I'll catch all the mosquitoes at the camp site.
♪ Don't move ♪
♪ Bang, bang, bang ♪
Now that I caught the mosquitoes, I'll take a walk.
What is it?
♪ Snake, snake, snake ♪
What are you doing?
And while G-Dragon is in the army, I'll make it a trend.
I'll totally make it a trend.
Make what a trend?
I'll make these mosquito coils my blush.
And these mushrooms will become my fingers.
Ribbit, ribbit.
Don't I look like a frog?
And lastly, this tent pole...
Will be my flute.
- Are you all ready? / - Yeah!
Let's start the performance.
Let's go!
♪ Flute, flute, ribbit, ribbit, flute, flute ♪
♪ If you cry, it'll rain on the pond ♪
Alright, you'll go sit down now.
Alright, I'll go sit down.
I'll totally miss you all.
Good job, CD.
Who wants to talk next?
Hello.
I love Hangeul and I'll never speak English.
I'm a proud Korean. I'm Kim Seongwon.
You'd better not speak English today.
Alright.
I'll talk about the various styles of dance today.
As you can see...
There's modern dance.
Right.
And representing Korea is...
- Korean dancing. / - Of course.
And representing the West...
- Is tippy-toe dancing. / - Tippy-toe?
Tippy-toe dancing?
What is this called?
Tippy-toe dancing?
- Why is this tippy-toe dancing? / - She's on her toes.
So it's called tippy-toe dancing?
You know about tippy-toe dancing, right?
- See? / - You don't know!
- Everyone calls it something else. / - No.
- It's two syllables. / - There isn't one.
Don't say it!
You said you wouldn't speak English!
Don't speak English!
Keep it in!
Ballet!
B-A-L-L-E-T!
Ballet!
- Romantic French ballet. / - Yeah!
Ethnic and jazz styled modern elements
contemporary ballet.
Lady-ballet.
Trum-ballet.
What's that?
Ballet over!
♪ I want no-ballet, no-ballet but you ♪
♪ I want no-ballet ♪
- Teacher. / - Yeah?
I can't not speak English.
Just call it ballet.
Don't make things so complicated.
- Can I keep going? / - Sure.
Alright.
Now, I'll talk about modes of transportation...
- Used frequently by Koreans. / - Okay.
First, this is an airplane.
You've all been on an airplane, right?
And the subway.
- The subway. / - We take the subway a lot.
And we use this to get to and from work.
This packed car.
Packed car?
- What's that called? / - A packed car.
That's really forcing it.
Why? It's a packed car.
Why is this called a packed car?
Because it's packed with people.
Not all the time though.
It's always packed.
Ma'am, you've heard of a packed car, right?
Oh, stop it!
- You know this one. / - A packed car!
Just say it.
Come on.
No! Don't say it!
- No! / - You said no English!
Keep it in! Don't say it!
Bus!
B-U-S!
- Bus! / - So you know.
- Seoul city tour bus. / - Wow! Yeah.
Alexander electric hybrid 300 double-decker bus.
Black bus-heads.
Pork hocks and bus pork.
Cho Yongpil!
Why bring him up?
♪ My heart goes bus, bus ♪
♪ I'm afraid to speak English ♪
- Teacher. / - Yeah.
I can't not speak English!
Alright, go sit down.
Alright, sir. Bye-bye.
- Bye-bye. / - Have fun, guys. Good night.
I love you.
Please be seated.
The principal will be here soon.
Hello, Mr. Principal.
Hello.
People come first.
I am the 19th principal of Bongsunga School,
Moon Gyojang.
I've been really into puzzles these days.
Do you all know what this work of art
on this puzzle is called?
I know!
"The Gleaners."
- What the... / - It's the Chinese character for person!
I didn't sleep for 2 nights trying to finish this!
Do any of the students here have any concerns?
Me! Me!
CD.
The elderly don't know who I am.
Is there a way for me to get them to like me?
The elderly will enjoy jokes
using agricultural products.
- Shall I show you? / - Yes!
I'll fill in for GD's absence.
I'm Moon-Dragon or MD.
First, this cabbage...
Will become my wig.
And this eggplant and potato...
Will become my mic.
Now, I'll put on a show for the elderly.
1, 2, 3.
♪ My love for you ♪
♪ Is a special ♪ People come first.
I hope people of all ages can get along
and laugh together.
(Are You Human?)
Are you Professor Hong Hyeonho?
I've always wanted to meet you!
Oh, it's nice to...
You look really familiar.
You look just like this robot I had at my house.
I do not.
- No, right? / - I'm not.
- You're the new scientist, right? / - Yes, that's right.
Alright, let's work well together.
As you know,
this is called the Fantastic Stone.
If the aliens get their hands on this stone,
it'll mean the end of our world in no time at all.
- We must protect this stone. / - Yes.
What does Professor Jo want?
Hologram.
Video chat.
Show me Professor Jo.
- Professor Hong. / - Yes.
An alien has invaded Earth to take the stone.
That alien drinks water through his ears.
And he is very flexible.
He's supposed to infiltrate your lab,
so please protect that stone.
Alright.
End call.
I'm out of here.
An alien in my lab?
Hey, you.
As soon as you got here.
they said an alien is in this lab.
That means!
You'd better be careful too.
- Pardon? / - Aliens are dangerous.
They'll destroy our world.
So what's your name?
My name is Park...
Nice to meet you.
That's a very strange name.
It's a family name.
My dad's name is Park...
Alright, alright.
Alright, alright. I didn't even ask.
Geez...
Professor Jo again? Now what?
Hologram.
Video chat.
Show me Professor Jo again.
- Yes? / - Yeah.
- Professor Hong. / - Yes.
You're still fine.
I don't think there's an alien in my lab.
- I got a description of the alien. / - What?
Take a good look around...
What is it?
Show me the photo
- The description... / - Yes.
- He looks like this. / - Like what?
- Like this. / - Like what?
- He looks like this. / - Stop moving it!
Like this...
There is a bad connection. This call will end.
End call.
- I'm out of here. / - What the...
What was that all about?
What is he talking...
Drinks water through his ear...
You're an alien!
- It's a misunderstanding. / - Didn't think I'd know?
My ear was dry.
Don't be ridiculous!
- Professor... / - You came to destroy Earth.
Die, alien!
So... Did I take him out?
I am not an alien.
You swallowed a bullet!
Now what? That's it...
I'm not.
The bullets bounced off him!
That's it...
Hey, what's that?
Take this!
He crushed the bullet into powder!
Now what?
I did crush the bullet, but I am not an alien.
What are you talking about?
Professor, please drop that scary gun.
What's wrong with my body?
You're using your powers on me!
- I'm not. / - This is psychokinesis!
- It is not. / - This is psychokinesis.
- Get rid of that gun. / - No!
Get up, professor.
- What is this? / - It isn't me, professor.
I'm going to lock you up.
Automatic door.
Close.
Fool.
Even if you're an alien,
you won't be able to get in easily.
Pass through.
He just walked through it!
Anyone can do it with practice.
You can do that with practice?
You haven’t tried hard enough.
What are you saying?
I'll use a weapon this time!
Bazooka!
He deflected a bazooka!
Then how about a cannon this time?
He swallowed the cannonball!
How is this...
No, professor.
This won't do.
I need to call Professor Jo for help.
Hologram.
Show me Professor Jo now.
What is it?
I can't do this by myself, Professor Jo.
- Professor Hong. / - Yes.
I'm sorry.
I'm too far away.
I wish you good luck.
End call.
Running away.
Hey!
He just ran away.
I wasn't going to do this.
My body...
Something's wrong with my body.
No...
The Fantastic Stone...
No...
With this Fantastic Stone...
With this Fantastic Stone!
The world is over!
Now I just need 890,000,000 more.
You have a long way to go.
I have to stay alive until then.
- I have to live a long time. / - What?
I need my health the conquer Earth.
What the...
(Call Center)
Hello, I'm Jeong Haecheol,
operator for cold noodles.
I'm Lee Hyeongjeong, operator for bags.
I'm Yang Seonil, operator for bidets.
I'm Yang Sangguk, operator for complaints.
How may I help you?
So, you want to know where our service center is?
Pyeongyang.
They're Pyeongyang cold noodles.
And we don't just use any meat.
Our meat...
It's alligator.
100% alligator leather.
Ma'am, if a woman has an alligator bag...
You'll have healthy bowel movements.
Very refreshing.
That's why people use bidets.
It could feel a bit awkward at first,
but after two or three uses...
You're cussing!
I never cussed at you, sir.
Sir, our bidet is very simple to install too.
Just take it out of the packaging and put the bidet...
Wear it on your shoulder.
You'll be a total fashion star.
It suits both formal and casual wear.
Ma'am, if you get a stain on this bag,
just use the leather cleaner we provide...
Mix it and eat it.
That makes it taste better.
Sir, you can even control the hot water for our bidet.
When the hot water comes out...
Add the noodles and boil for just 3 minutes.
They'll be nice and chewy.
Ma'am, when the weather is hot like this,
make your husband some refreshing...
Open it!
Go ahead and open it!
It's all in there.
If you keep insisting like that, I have no choice....
It massages your sphincter.
It's good for you.
And other bidets use tap water
but ours uses purified water and it's...
A radish kimchi broth.
It's very refreshing.
The broth was made by a kimchi-making family...
It was made by a famous Italian designer.
That's why it's a bit pricy.
And we prepared some special broth
for the hot days of summer.
That broth...
It was made using an entire alligator.
You don't have to doubt us.
Ma'am, wear this bag and show it to your husband.
Then he'll...
The lid opens.
The lid opens automatically when you're near it.
And it's very simple to use our bidet.
Just sit on it comfortably and...
Take a photo and send it.
We'll send you the product again after confirming.
So you want to buy one, ma'am?
You made a great choice.
When you our bag today...
Cut it with scissors.
And as an accessory to hang on your bag...
We'll throw in a plunger.
Lastly, let me confirm your name, ma'am.
Your name is...
It's Yang Sangguk!
I don't care if you sue me! Do whatever you want!
Yes, ma'am.
Thank you for your purchase.
(Sweet Potato)
We are sweet potatoes.
Frustrating sweet potatoes.
Happy birthday.
Thanks.
Your birthday present.
It looks nice.
There.
How does it look?
It looks good.
Here's my gift.
Thanks.
Where does it start?
Found it.
Where does it start?
There.
Where does it start?
There.
How do I open this?
We are sweet potatoes.
Frustrating sweet potatoes.
I'm sleepy.
I'm going to sleep.
We are sweet potatoes.
Frustrating sweet potatoes.
(Refreshing Statements)
Get out of your car!
You get out of your car, lady!
Geez... Mister! You almost ran into me.
What kind of driving was that?
You're the one that needs to learn how to drive.
Let's get our stories straight first.
You're the one that cut me off.
Why are you in such a hurry?
You could've waited for my car to pass first.
If you just charge in like that,
who'd be able to avoid you?
Don't you look? Do you drive with your eyes closed?
Or do you drive with your feet?
Don't just stand there.
Say something.
Geez... The nerve...
I was so worked up that I kept my mouth shut.
Did you get up on the wrong side of the bed?
Why are you throwing such a hissy fit?
You're the one that was driving aggressively.
Why are you blaming this on me?
I had my blinker on and I was trying to merge.
You could've let me in.
Were you too busy to give way?
Does that lane belong to you?
This guy keeps running his mouth.
Why doesn't he just apologize?
Don't you know that I have priority?
You don't know the basics. You shouldn't drive.
How did you even get your license?
Did you get your license from an arcade?
You think you'll get points for crashing into me?
Is this bumper cars?
Oh, I guess you knew I was a woman
and you figured you could just cut me off.
It's a good thing I'm a good driver with good reflexes.
Or else you would've hit me!
So would you like a smiley face sticker?
Or how about I just kick a dent in your car?
Why does gender matter when driving?
It's about who's at fault.
That's what's important.
You are not good at driving, lady.
I'm the one that avoided an accident.
Lady, how long have you been driving?
Did you just start?
I got a perfect score on my driver's test.
I was a driver in the army too.
No accidents for 10 years, which means
my license was automatically upgraded.
The country has labeled me as a good driver!
And I still drive stick!
You don't even know how to drive manual!
If you like going straight so much, drive a train.
Why are you on the road
and running your mouth like a woodpecker?
Fine, I'll peck at your car like a woodpecker.
Where should I peck? Through your windows?
Your wheels? Should I make another gas hole?
Go ahead so that I can go already!
I'm a busy man!
If you're so busy, you should've came yesterday!
Why were you in such a rush?
This is the type of guy that barges into the subway
without letting the people off first.
That's why you cause accidents.
People like you that don't let people merge
will end up dying soon anyway.
Watch it, mister!
Watch it, lady!
Geez, he never backs down.
I'm scared he'll start liking me.
Well, you're just scary!
What are you doing up there?
Are you two dating?
Do you live here?
- Stay out of this! / - Stay out of this!
I can't believe you, mister.
You still won't apologize.
There's no point in talking more.
Let's handle this legally.
Oh, please. You know nothing about laws.
Of course I do. I know a lot about laws.
Traffic law 19, article 3 states that changing lanes
is only allowed if you don't disrupt
the path of other cars.
If the merging car cuts off the other car
and hits the rear or the side,
80% of the blame goes to the merging car
that tried to force its way into the lane.
So if we had collided,
it would've been your fault
and you'd have to pay me.
You'd be paying if it was someone else!
I'm a nice person
so I'm just going to let this slide!
I didn't crash into you!
If you know the laws so well,
how about driving with some etiquette?
You drive with no etiquette!
Do you even know what etiquette means?
I'm sure it means something nice!
You don't even understand Korean!
Why are you speaking in tongues?
If you like foreign languages so much,
go live abroad!
No, I prefer Korea. You go.
Why would I go when I asked you to? You go!
Why should I listen to you? You go.
How old are you to talk to me like this?
I'm fifty-one! How old are you?
I'm thirty-forty-five!
You're not even making sense.
You'd better stop before I smack you.
Want me to slap you silly?
- Go ahead! / - You think I won't?
(The Everything Show)
The amazing show starts now!
The team to open up our show
just came from touring Southeast Asia.
Watch some feats of strength!
Hello.
We've been practicing feats of strength for 10 years.
- I'm Gupal! / - And I'm Chilsip.
Gupal and Chilsip!
We are not here to sell things.
$20 for hiking shoes.
- You could hike up Mount Everest with this. / - Hey.
What are you doing?
It's not like that...
Why you...
We have hiking socks too.
For the feat of strength we'll show you...
We'll stretch out this rubber band, release it
and try to endure the pain.
Impressive, Chilsip!
Gupal will do it!
What?
Huh?
- Chilsip. / - Yeah?
I can't do it.
- You can't? / - That's right!
We need to talk things over.
Gupal, follow me.
Gupal, if you do this...
I won't wear your underwear anymore.
My favorite pair of underwear!
- You'd better keep your promise. / - Alright.
Then I'll do it.
Great.
I'm scared! Where are you going?
Chilsip! Chilsip! Chilsip!
Gupal, are you okay?
We sell girdles too.
Nice one.
Hold on!
Don't sell stuff here.
Leave.
Come backstage if you want to buy it!
Just $5!
- Get out. / - $5.
Allow me to introduce the next show.
They started the folk music craze in Korea.
It's C'est Si Bon!
♪ Stand up, stand up ♪
♪ Just try again ♪
♪ Last Friday night ♪
♪ I grinded with a girl at the club ♪
♪ An innocent girl with long straight hair ♪
♪ Let me show you her photo ♪
That's my little sister.
♪ Stand up, stand up ♪
♪ Just try again ♪
♪ I have a blind date next week ♪
♪ Seonguk, can I borrow some clothes? ♪
♪ Taewon, my clothes won't fit you ♪
♪ The size is too small ♪
♪ It'll stretch out, it'll stretch out ♪
♪ Just try again ♪
♪ I felt it instinctively ♪
♪ I went on a blind date yesterday ♪
♪ Two girls and three guys ♪
♪ One person had to leave ♪
♪ I felt it instinctively ♪
♪ That I had to leave ♪
♪ Don't worry, Taewon ♪
♪ You're very likable ♪
♪ You're a nice guy ♪
♪ You're really nice ♪
♪ You seem nice ♪
♪ I felt it instinctively ♪
♪ That I have nothing good to say ♪
♪ I felt it instinctively ♪
Our next performers mastered Korean singing at birth!
It's the genius traditional singers!
Hello!
We're the last remaining traditional singers in this era.
- We're the Nonsense! / - Nonsense!
The story we'll tell you today...
Is "Heungbu and Nolbu."
Great.
Heungbu got hungry and asked Nolbu for food.
Nolbu's wife got angry
and this is what she said as she slapped
Heungbu with a rice paddle!
Don't eat that.
Share it with your skin.
- Nonsense! / - Nonsense!
♪ Out of white rice, brown rice and black rice ♪
♪ The best is Jerry Rice ♪
- Nonsense! / - Nonsense!
Heungbu fixed the sparrow's broken leg.
Then the sparrow came with a gourd seed
to show his gratitude.
Nice.
And this is what the sparrow said to Heungbu...
Pay for the delivery.
- Nonsense! / - Nonsense!
♪ Out of Park, Choi and Lee ♪
♪ The best is Ida Daussy ♪
- Nonsense! / - Nonsense!
Nolbu saw this and broke a sparrow's leg.
He also got a gourd seed and the gourd opened.
This is what the goblin from the gourd said!
It's a good day.
It isn't a good day.
- It's a moderate day. / - Nonsense!
Nonsense!
♪ Out of pumpkin, watermelon and squash ♪
♪ The best is Sandara Park ♪
- Nonsense! / - Nonsense!
The next performers conquered the Billboard Chart!
- It's BTS! / - Nonsense!
♪ If you're going to speak nonsense just ♪
- ♪ Leave ♪ / - Nonsense!
For our next show, watch the twins
and their amazing teamwork!
Okay, let's get it!
Out of batteries.
That hurts!
That tickles!
Candy!
The next show is an amazing show
that you can only see here.
It's the Three Fat Tenors!
♪ 10 servings of beef loin ♪
♪ Change, change, change ♪
♪ Change them all to large orders ♪
That's a good idea.
♪ I'm hungry ♪
♪ Hello? ♪
♪ Is there any meat? ♪
Nope.
- No. / - Nope.
♪ Sounds good ♪
♪ When my mom was at work and not at home ♪
♪ I always made myself 15 packs of instant noodles ♪
And I ate that with rice.
Wow... Impressive.
♪ I'm hungry ♪
♪ Sounds good ♪
♪ I'm hungry, sounds good, I want some ♪
1, 2, 3, 4.
♪ The round ham has risen ♪
It's this big.
♪ I'm hungry ♪
♪ Choo-choo, choo-choo ♪
Your rice is done cooking.
Let's eat.
Just one bite.
♪ Sounds good ♪
♪ I eat alone ♪
- You ate by yourself? / - You ate by yourself?
You ate by yourself?
- It's not like that... / - When?
When?
How could you do that?
(Two Job Republic)
Welcome. This is Two Job Cafe.
Hello.
So, what's good here?
This is our best seller.
Oh, the Americano?
Then I'll have one Americano.
How about this?
A bagel?
Yeah, I'll take one of those too.
How about this?
White mocha granita?
Now, take your glasses off and I'll check each eye.
What are you doing?
I'm a cafe owner and an eye doctor
in Two Job Republic.
$1.50 and $1.50 so that's $3 total.
- That's how much I owe you? / - Yes.
Here you go.
Yes, commander! I'll return at once!
Salute!
You must be a soldier.
Yes.
I was in the army too. It's really tough.
Yes.
And it's so hot these days.
Yes! It's very hot.
What the...
Due to the high pressure in the North Pacific,
we're expecting a heat wave.
What are you doing?
In Two Job Republic... Salute! I'm a soldier
and a weather caster.
When you go out in this hot weather...
Unacceptable attire, unacceptable attire.
Who said to untuck your shirt? Sit.
- What the... / - Stand.
Sit, stand, sit, stand!
Why are you doing this to me? This is tiring!
You should refrain from excessive exercise.
- What? / - This has been weather caster Park Sora.
Salute!
What a strange woman.
Please change it.
- Can you hold this? / - Sure.
What the...
What is he doing?
My mission to shower with water cooler water!
Success!
What are you doing?
I'm a water deliveryman
and an internet BJ!
Wow! Thank you for the 300 moon balloons!
- Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang... / - A gun!
- Get down! / - What the...
That wasn't a gun!
Geez...
Here's your car key.
Thank you.
- Did you park it? / - Of course.
It's a rental car so I'm worried.
- Oh, really? / - Yes.
- So you owe me $3 for the valet fee. / - Okay.
- Hold on. / - And $30 for this fine.
What's the fine for?
I'm a valet parker and a parking enforcement officer.
What?
I just parked it on the shoulder for a minute
and you got a ticket.
- From me. / - What?
- Your car was almost towed. / - What?
- By me. / - What are you saying?
Hold on. That car's being towed!
- Isn't that your car? / - Hold on.
It's too far. I can't see.
You have astigmatism.
- You need new glasses. / - Why would I do that?
Sir, here's your coffee.
Oh, yes.
Thank you.
What is it?
What are you doing?
I'm a part-timer at this cafe
and a stuntman.
I only touched you.
What are you doing in my spot?
Stand up.
Get up. Get up.
Get up!
- This has been weather caster Park Sora. / - Huh?
What happened?
This guy just... What happened?
- What is it? / - He's dead.
- What? / - He's dead...
- What? / - You killed him!
It wasn't me! Now what?
Our prank was a success!
What's with this country?
(Ugly Inside)
It's nice to go on museum dates.
♪ Sprouting, sprouting ♪
♪ Yumi is sprouting in my heart ♪
Gosh, that was so random.
- Honey. / - Yeah?
Isn't that piece really famous?
I saw it in a book. What's that called again?
Oh, that.
- Let's break up. / - What?
My face keeps changing.
I can't even recognize my own face.
Same for me. I can't recognize my face.
That's why I like it.
- It's not like that... / - Honey.
I don't care how your face changes.
You're the only one I love.
Yumi, I'm sorry.
Don't ever say that again.
Alright. I love you, Yumi.
Honey.
Isn't that necklace really pretty?
Wow, it caught my eye earlier.
It would be nice to wear even now.
Don't you think so?
Want me to buy it for you?
How could you afford that?
They sell it at the souvenir shop.
- Really? / - I'll buy it.
You're the best!
A necklace.
Gosh, this is wonderful.
Wow.
I guess they throw events at this museum.
Are you cosplaying?
- I am Byeongcheol. / - What?
♪ Sprouting, sprouting ♪
♪ Yumi is sprouting in my heart ♪
I love you!
Goodness...
Byeongcheol... Are you for real?
Wow...
- Why are you Japanese now? / - Yumi!
A necklace.
Gosh...
Take this necklace
and hang it on your neck!
Yes!
Thanks, Byeongcheol.
I feel like you didn't buy this and
you got this through plundering.
I used my credit card. Installment payments!
Alright, thanks, Byeongcheol.
Should we go over there and check it out?
- Yes! / - Yes!
What is it? What is it?
What's wrong? What is it?
- That's the Yi Sunsin exhibition! / - Huh?
So scary!
- What? / - Yi Sunsin is scary!
It is not scary.
- What is it? / - I just peed myself!
Oh, come on!
Beat it! You're disgusting!
Thank you very much!
- It's too much! / - Yi Sunsin!
- He's so scary! / - You went too far!
- So scary! So scary! / - Honey!
Why did you turn into a Japanese person?
Really, Yumi?
Don't ever change again!
Alright, Yumi. Sorry.
Let's go to the Western museum.
- I want to see it. / - Is it open now?
I'll go check it out.
Oh, right. I'll change again.
I won't go.
No, honey.
I have a good feeling about this one.
Since it's the western museum,
you might turn into David.
- Really? / - Or Hercules.
Alright, I'll be right back.
I'll go change real quick.
Make sure you're shirtless.
Did you change?
Come back out.
This is Sparta!
My gosh!
My heart is racing!
Awesome. You look so tough, honey. So cool.
Are you Byeongcheol?
I'm Byeongcheol! Sparta!
You're so manly!
Can you just keep this look?
You're so dreamy right now!
Honey, can't you say anything else?
Can't you say anything else?
How can we go on dates like this?
Say something.
What's wrong?
What is it? What's wrong?
What is it?
Are you okay?
Honey! What's wrong?
Sparta!
S-P-A-R-T-A!
Sparta!
What are you doing?
- Do that at Bongsunga School. / - Tomato Sparta-ghetti.
- Do that at Bongsunga... / - Under-sparta!
What are you doing?
Beat it.
This is Ugly Inside!
What is this?
What's with this shield? Take this too!
Goodness... What is this?
What is this?
Honey, this is so embarrassing.
Let's just go home.
What are you talking about?
I'm a part-timer for an event here.
I'm playing Cleopatra!
Sorry, I thought you were my boyfriend. I'm sorry.
Would you like a photo?
No, I'm fine.
Where did you get your nose done?
What?
Do they give celebrity discounts?
I didn't get my nose done.
Come on! Just tell me!
Why does Cleopatra's nose look like that?
I don't know.
- Tell me! / - Please stop this.
Where's Byeongcheol? Where are you?
- Byeongcheol. / - Take your hands off my girl!
It's Byeongcheol.
My goodness...
I can't believe my eyes.
Yumi, it's Byeongcheol.
Don't act like you know me.
I became Venus, the goddess of beauty.
Hey, why are you hitting on my girl?
I'm just a part-timer!
A part...
You're kind of pretty.
You're disgusting.
A disgusting guy just called me disgusting.
- Hey, you're like a dirty sock! / - Stop it.
You look homeless! Get a haircut!
- A haircut? / - Stop fighting.
You're the one who...
What's your problem?
- Don't hit my nose! / - Don't fight!
Don't! Don't fight!
Stop it. I've seen this before.
I've seen this on "Alien vs. Predator!" Stop it.
Please stop.
- Yumi. / - Stop.
Hold on...
Stop it!
My eyes!
Yumi.
My eyes!
You decide. Who is the goddess of beauty?
This is Sparta.
Huh? What was that?
This is Sparta!
(Ms. Shin)
Hello, Ms. Shin.
What do I do?
Are you concerned about something?
No, no.
You don't like the lines?
- Director Jang. / - Yes?
I'm just saying this because it's you.
I left my car parked in the sun.
Don't you think it'll get too hot?
- The car? / - Yeah.
Then just park it under a tree in some shade.
Then I'll get bird poop on my car,
As well as pine resin.
I got my car hand-washed for $38 yesterday.
I see.
Then I'll park it in an indoor lot.
- Not there! / - Why not?
It's too expensive.
I'll give you a parking pass.
Then park it there!
You're the best at being cheap.
I'm a very thrifty person.
I only use makeup samples.
- Really? / - Yeah.
You have the best baby skin in show business!
Actually, the parts you can't see are more...
Oh, forget it.
Anyway, you're a sharp one, star director.
Hello, director.
The female lead in our drama!
You have the best baby skin in show business!
Oh! You have the best baby skin in show business!
I work in the food truck.
You make the best cold soup.
So refreshing.
I'll show you where the food truck is. Come with me.
This way.
Hello, Ms. Shin.
Hey there.
I bought some coffee.
- Please have some. / - Oh, thanks.
I've been craving...
Oh, hot coffee in the hot summer.
I'm already sweating before I had any.
I guess I'm heated.
Ms. Shin.
I have a photo shoot today.
Can we do a quick rehearsal?
- Goodness, hey. / - Yes?
What's more important? Acting or a photo shoot?
So what kind of photo shoot is it?
Since it's summer, it's a bikini shoot...
How indecent!
How indecent! How shameful!
Hey! You think I don't have what it takes?
Gosh... They stretch out your arms and legs.
You call that a photo shoot? That's CG.
You're already a Na'vi.
Can we just rehearse once?
Go ahead and run your mouth.
Lady.
Who said to wash this by hand?
Young miss.
You left that in the laundry basket.
So, are you saying it's my fault?
Can't you tell?
Lady, you couldn't afford this even with a year's pay.
Young miss.
I'm sorry.
I won't do that next time.
Next time when?
Geez!
It's so obvious that you're uneducated.
Forget all that.
Pay for this shirt.
Pay for it! Pay for it!
Young miss.
Don't do this.
I can't take this anymore.
- Goodness, hey. / - Yes?
Did I kick you in the stomach?
Didn't you see that I kicked you in the shin?
You're too late.
You're trying to make the people hate me.
You were so excited when you screamed.
Someone might think the soprano Kim Sumi is here.
It's Jo Sumi.
Goodness, hey!
Are you trying to teach me?
I was correcting you.
My goodness gracious!
If you're so smart, you should've been a teacher.
Gosh, youngsters are so scary these days!
I'm sorry.
- Goodness, hey. / - Yes?
Didn't you see me kick you 12 times?
Hello.
- Nami. / - Hey, Taehun.
Did you get a part in a soccer movie?
No, I was rehearsing.
You're working hard.
I did a commercial for sandals.
It's a gift.
Thanks.
- Hope you like them. / - Okay.
- Post that on your social media. / - Okay.
- Hello, Ms. Shin. / - Hi, Taehun.
- I did a commercial for sandals. / - I needed a pair.
- Oh, these are acupressure slippers. / - Yes.
How medical.
I don't know if they'll work on my calluses.
- Ms. Shin. / - Yeah.
I have a photo shoot.
Can you coach me on my acting real quick?
Taehun, you're doing a photo shoot?
Yes, a seasonal photo shoot.
Goodness.
So, are you going to run around the beach
wearing a tiny swimming suit?
Goodness, I didn't even go on vacation.
Taehun, can I come to your photo shoot?
It's a shoot for winter jackets.
Why are they shooting that so early?
Geez...
Anyway, you'll look amazing
even in a winter jacket, Taehun.
Nobody else has a perfect body like you.
Goodness, it's like a work of art.
Let me save it in my heart.
Save it...
- Ms. Shin. / - Yeah?
Can you coach me on my acting?
Sure.
You living statue.
For this scene, you have to lean
on my shoulder and sleep.
- Let's try it. / - Alright.
That's a very important scene.
I'm sorry.
What is it?
What is it? I washed my hair today.
It's still fine.
It's not that. I missed the timing.
Life is all about timing.
You have to go for it when the timing is right.
I won't miss it.
Let me try again.
I missed my timing.
Alright.
I'm sorry.
What is it?
What is it? Did I breathe too hard through my nose?
It's not like that.
I fell asleep with the AC on last night.
I think I have some cold symptoms.
A cold?
Then how about I come over
and nurse you all night?
I'm all better now.
Alright.
Tell me whenever you're sick.
I'm the Nightingale of Yeouido.
Let me just say my line this time.
Alright.
No. We're just friends.
She's even pretty when she's sleeping.
Sleep tight.
Don't go.
I don't want to be friends anymore.
I want to be your girl.
Don't go!
Don't go... Don't go.
Ms. Shin.
In the script, it says you stay asleep.
- I'm supposed to stay asleep? / - Yes.
If you look here,
"Sleeps like she's having a sad dream."
How do I sleep like I'm having a sad dream?
Like this?
That looks about right.
- Goodness! / - What is it?
- I really fell asleep. / - Really?
I guess I got a bit too into it.
- Snap out of it. / - Goodness.
I'm sorry, Ms. Shin.
Nami has her photo shoot coming up,
so can we film her scene first?
No.
I'll push back the photo shoot.
You do your scene first, Ms. Shin.
Goodness! Yes! It's so nice to see
how considerate everyone is on set.
Hey, this is the most I've ever liked you.
Let me just go fix my makeup.
While Ms. Shin is in makeup
let's go eat.
Goodness, you're going to eat?
I love stir-fried potato strings.
Are you going to eat because I'm going into makeup
or am I going into makeup when you're about to eat?
Both.
- Goodness... / - Why don't you join us?
It's not because I want to eat.
Ms. Shin takes amazing care of herself.
She doesn't eat anything after 6 p.m.
Right?
I going to beat you up today and go to jail!
(Momentary Home Shopping)
Hello, everyone.
This is Momentary Home Shopping with Lee Munjae
and we'll start now.
The product I'd like to show you today
is this kimchi refrigerator.
We've brought in the developer and CEO, Yoo Minsang.
Hello.
Keep your kimchi in a kimchi refrigerator.
That's right, people.
Yoo Minsang's kimchi refrigerator
is very hot even offline too.
Go to any electronics store.
All the employees recommend...
- Yoo Minsang's kimchi refrigerator. / - That's right.
Because they don't sell.
What?
They have to sell them to get promoted.
What are you saying?
Housewives recommend it to other housewives.
To share the misery.
What are you saying?
Yoo Minsang's kimchi refrigerator
can replicate the taste of kimchi
from a crock buried in the ground.
How you ask?
If you buy our product today,
our employees will take your new kimchi refrigerator
and bury it in your master bedroom.
Will it go through the apartment floor
to the floor below?
- That's why it's surprising. / - Very much so.
Now we'll bring in Chef Kim Suyeong,
who uses our product, and talk with him.
Come on out.
Hello. I'm Kim Suyeong.
I store the majority of my ingredients
in Yoo Minsang's kimchi refrigerator.
It's not broken from the frost.
This is a feature of Yoo Minsang's kimchi refrigerator.
It's very simple.
Just scrape off the frost.
- Just scrape off the frost. / - It's very simple.
I got a lot, didn't I?
What are you doing?
I made shaved ice!
You made what?
What are you doing?
It's mine!
Oh, come on!
Show them the kimchi refrigerator!
What's his deal?
Let us tell you all more about our product.
Yoo Minsang's kimchi refrigerator
has an amazing ripening feature.
I'll show you myself.
Take a look. I'll open this...
Look how ripe the cabbage kimchi is.
That looks great.
Nice and ripe.
The radish kimchi is nice and ripe.
That looks ripe and delicious.
And look how well cooked this meat is.
Hold on... Meat?
This isn't an oven!
Housewives have to cook and do the dishes.
So before they open their fridge,
they have to wash their hands
or take their rubber gloves off.
What a hassle.
But Yoo Minsang's kimchi refrigerator
opens automatically with two knocks.
I'll show you.
I think someone's in there.
Let me knock again.
Geez... I'll be right out.
What?
Hold on!
This is...
Is someone in there?
What are ordinary kimchi refrigerators like?
As soon as you open one...
- You get that strong kimchi smell. / - Right.
But Yoo Minsang's kimchi refrigerator
has a deodorizing function.
Let me show you.
I press this.
Now I'll check the smell.
What is this?
I don't smell a thing, people.
Hold on.
I really don't smell a thing.
Hold on. Someone's in there.
Someone's in there!
Someone is in there.
Now, we'll bring in someone that bought our product
and hear his review.
Come on out!
Hello, my name is Jeong Haecheol.
I live in Dangsan and I'm 33 years old.
I've been using Yoo Minsang's
kimchi refrigerator for 3 years.
Even the kimchi I put in there 2 years ago
is still crispy and delicious.
And I thought about why.
It's because the kimchi I sell is amazing!
What?
Yoo Minsang's kimchi refrigerator
will turn your kimchi sour.
But my kimchi will stay great!
Excuse me, what are you doing?
Yoo Minsang's kimchi refrigerator
is very popular overseas too.
My foreigner friend used it once and...
Oh, my God! I sell mustard leaf kimchi too!
Yoo Minsang's kimchi refrigerator
is filled with colon bacillus.
My kimchi is filled with lactobacillus!
What are you saying?
What is this thing?
Hey! Why would you kick it?
Don't you all want one?
Please call now.
We can do an installment plan with no interest.
Haecheol's kimchi.
No! Why would you promote that?
Let's cut to a quick commercial break.
♪ Water park ♪
♪ So hot, so hot ♪
♪ Water park ♪
Say what?
♪ So hot, so hot ♪
♪ Let's make it hot ♪
♪ So hot, so hot ♪
Yoo Minsang's kimchi refrigerator.
What?
How was that relevant?
At least have some kimchi stains on you!
Don't you all want one, people?
Please call now.
This has been Yoo Minsang's chicken soup.
- It's a kimchi refrigerator! / - It's the best.
Geez!
(Pigeon Magic Troupe)
They're here to make up for their dark pasts.
Introducing Mr. Gwon of the Pigeon Magic Troupe!
Hello.
I'm Magician Gwon Jaegwan.
Before I show you my amazing trick...
I'll show you a simple sketchbook trick.
We have a sketchbook here.
In this sketchbook...
There's nothing.
I'll draw the face of a person in the audience
in the sketchbook.
Who should I pick?
You?
Are you confident?
Alright then...
I will now draw the face
of this girl in the audience.
This is hard.
Eyes...
Mouth...
And...
The nose... Hold on...
I drew your nostrils.
The shape of her face...
It's egg-shaped.
Egg-shaped, right?
And...
Some hair...
Eyebrows...
Looks just like her.
It looks just like this girl.
Miss...
Where are you looking? Look at me.
Don't just look at me. Look that way too.
How about a big smile since this is Gag Concert?
Let's see a big smile. Abracadabra!
Amazing, right?
Now I'll try this amazing trick
with a member of the audience.
Who was an art major?
Raise your hand.
Art major.
- Here. / - What?
Come on up.
You majored in art?
I only graduated high school.
- You took art in high school, right? / - Yes.
Don't be nervous.
Now, I'll make your eyes move.
Abra, abra, abra...
Cadabra!
Hey, my eyes didn't move.
You're too nervous.
This is Gag Concert.
- And we are nice magicians. / - Yes.
Everyone, look here.
Abra, abra..
Abracadabra!
Now we need to see a big smile.
Abracadabra!
- You just smiled, didn't you? / - Yes!
- Applause! / - Applause!
Now, it's time for the highlight of our show.
As you can see...
There's nothing in this barrel...
And here...
This barrel has steel bars.
Now I'll call in a beautiful assistant
to help with this trick.
Beautiful assistant, come on out.
Oh, well.
She's not quite beautiful, is she?
I'll just call her my plain assistant.
Plain assistant.
Please get inside this barrel.
Please hurry.
Once our plain assistant moves from
this barrel to the barrel with bars,
she'll gain freedom like you all.
If she can't get to the other barrel,
she'll have to live in this barrel forever.
I'll show you all this frightening trick.
Now it's time to turn the barrels.
Turn the barrels.
One more time.
So...
Did our plain assistant
move to the other barrel?
Please open it.
Let's all say the magic word at the count of 3.
1, 2, 3!
- Abracadabra! / - Abracadabra!
Amazing, right?
Now we'll get our plain assistant out.
Good job.
You can go.
Now, we'll bring in Magician Yun Seunghyeon
to try this trick again.
Magician Yun Seunghyeon.
Yes, boss.
This way please.
For this trick,
you'll move from this barrel into this barrel with bars.
You can do this, right?
I had bad experience behind bars once.
We've all had bad experiences behind bars.
- We've all been to jail. / - Yes.
So get in there.
So, will Magician Yun Seunghyeon
be able to get through
to this other barrel?
Alright!
Now, let's turn the barrels.
Once...
I sure hope Magician Yun Seunghyeon got through.
Let's open this.
Let's all say the magic word at the count of 3.
1, 2, 3.
Abracadabra!
Come on out!
Did I get through, boss?
He did a great job!
- Applause! / - Applause!